What December 5th means to me (CHRIS)

Psychic Medium Chris,  does talk about the loss of both parents of the Christmas Season.  We hope that this will help you out. 

How to Grieve Over the Holidays

First Holiday Without Mom or Dad

Losing a parent is never easy, but the first Christmas after the death of someone you love is a special kind of difficult. During a time when jingling bells and twinkling lights are supposed to make you smile, you can’t help but be constantly reminded of who’s missing and the pain of that loss. Gift giving, carol singing, cookie baking… every tradition feels tainted by this tragedy, seemingly forever. Will you ever be able to enjoy the holidays again? Maybe you feel guilty for even wanting to feel that joy.

While there’s no rulebook when it comes to processing grief during the holidays, we do have some recommendations on how to survive this season. 

Acknowledge the Loss

First and foremost, it’s okay that you’re struggling. We’re often tempted to dismiss or suppress negative emotions during this time because of the expectations that this is a happy time, especially if you’re trying to be “strong” for other grieving family members. Let that pressure go! Don’t ignore your grief. Feel all your feelings, whatever they might be. You’re allowed to be sad, angry, anxious, annoyed… all at once! You never have to pretend otherwise. You’ve been through something tragic, and disregarding that is not fair to you. Whenever you need to acknowledge that your parent is gone. Say it out loud. You won’t ruin Christmas by doing so. It’s the truth, and it’s also the truth that the holidays are happening with or without the people who’ve passed away. Only by accepting the situation, not by denying or avoiding it, can you process and heal.

Take It Easy

Don’t overdo it this year. It’s okay not to go to every party or to leave early from the ones you do attend. It’s okay to tell friends and family you’re not able to do certain traditions, trips, or activities. Grief takes a toll on our minds and bodies, so you might feel extra tired, irritable, weepy, etc. You don’t have to make a million cookies. You don’t have to get a picture with Santa. You don’t have to watch every Christmas movie. Instead of a massive group outing to the drive-through light festival, perhaps this year you can just go on a walk with your dog to check out your neighborhood’s decorations. Instead of laboring away on individualized DIY gifts for everyone, maybe this is the year it’s okay to just give folks Starbucks gift cards. Make things easier for yourself so that you have the time and space to rest, recover, and reflect on what you’ve lost and what the holidays look like without your parent.